"I want my husband back." Have you said this to others? Even if things were not as good as they could have been before the break up, it is possible to still want him in your life. But before "I want my husband back" becomes your personal mantra, you should give serious thought to why things were the way they were that lead to the break up in the first place.
What caused the break? Do you know who, exactly, was at fault? Or are you both to blame? Since it is often the case that many things contribute to the failure of a relationship, it may be hard to pin it down to just one thing, event or person.
If no overt reasons, such as betrayal or infidelity, clearly exist, then your vow of "I want my husband back" just might stand a chance of coming true.
Of course, if something truly devastating did happen, like an affair or betrayal, then reunification will be a difficult feat. If you both want the relationship to continue, and you both work at it, it can happen. But you both have to want it, or no amount of chanting, "I want my husband back" will help.
Do you know if he's willing to get back together with you? Have you asked him? Do you know how he feels about the whole thing? While you may be saying "I want my husband back" he may be saying something like, "I'm ready to move on and change my life." You may be startled by what you learn.
It doesn't mean he doesn't care. It may only mean that he no longer wants what wasn't working for him in your relationship. He may not have been able to put words to his unhappiness and the break up seemed to him like the only alternative. That may not be the case, however. Whatever he felt unhappy about can probably be fixed, if you are both willing to try.
Working on fixing the problems in your relationship will mean good, open communication on both your parts. Learning how to fix a broken relationship means both of you must learn about the problems and be able to talk them over. Read a marriage manual together and discuss it when the concepts you learned together are still freshly in your thoughts.
If he shows no interest is seeking outside counseling, do not get upset or make a big deal of it. The process of repairing your relationship may take longer when going for counseling by yourself, but you will still learn valuable skills that you can use and you will no longer have to bore your friends with repeating, "I want my husband back." You will have him!
You can teach him a thing or two about fixing the relationship by using the techniques you will be taught by the counselor. Your husband will see the difference in you and may eventually come to realize that your marriage is worth saving. In any case, the techniques you master in this process will help you, if not your marriage, in the future and that is a sense of personal power that is invaluable.
Having a personal sense of power gives you a confidence that may have been lacking before. Self-confidence is an attractive thing to most men. Reminding him of how he first felt about you when your relationship began, i.e., his initial attraction to you, may be just the trick that will change your mantra from "I want my husband back" to "I got him back!"